CD Haiku Writing Techniques #4

Surprise

I guess this is that "AHA! moment, or the epiphany.   I notice in the example an obvious kigo, and phrase plus fragment structure, but the absence of 1st-3rd line interchangeability.  I guess you can't have everything every time.  Should the surprise be the entire moment captured by the haiku, or the 3rd line in the context of the first two?  I'm not sure that question has an answer.  What do you think?

autumn wind
trying to keep myself
under my hat

© John Stevenson

Here, at least part of the surprise is the humerous idea of staying under the hat, rather than keeping the hat from blowing away - a clever twist. 

~~::~::~~

Maybe these are senryu

looking at her

so lovely across the room

she looks back at me

~:~

 stealing that first kiss

what will she think of me now

the tip of her tongue

~:~

on a winter night

she brings me her best gift

sweet cherry blossom

~:~

We have a wooden front door with a glass storm door facing south.  As I write this, it is 19 degrees outside (-7 C) with bright sun.  On days like this, if I don't open the wooden door to let the heat escape into house, the door will get so hot I can smell the rosin vaporizing from the wood.

the deep snow blanket

glistening white in my yard

glare of winter sun

 ©JzB