The Lighter Side of JzB

Here you will find photos, poetry, and possibly some light-hearted foolishness. For the Heavier Side
of JzB
see my other blog,
Retirement Blues. (There be dragons!)

I claim copyright and reserve all rights for my original material of every type and genre.

Every day visits*
From Moose, Goose, and Orb Weaver
All seized by Haiku

"Why moose and goose?" you may ask. Back on 2/04/13 Pirate wrote a haiku with an elk in it, and I responded with
one with a moose and then included him every day. A few days later in comments Mystic asked "Where's the goose?"
So I started including her with this post on 2/07. A week later on the 14th, Mark Readfern
asked for and received a spider. The rest is history.

*Well, most days, anyway. Grant me a bit of poetic license.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Five Sentence Fiction

My original intent was to have each of my FSF entries be self contained.  But my last two have haunted me to the point where I wrote an FSF follow-up for each of them.

I was looking forward to today's prompt with almost frantic eagerness, hoping I could use one of them without too much of a force fit.  I think this works.


With a smile and a contented sigh, Gil's wife comments on how much more ardent his love making has become.

She doesn't realize that at those most intimate moments, when Gil gazes deep into the beauty of her doe-like eyes, he is haunted by thoughts of Marci.

She isn't aware that, since that chance encounter at the pharmacy, Gil's thoughts keep returning, unbidden, to long-ago memories of Marci's moist lips, subtle curves, and tender moans.

She doesn't know that in the midst of their seemingly perfect marriage, Gil is now conflicted.

She must never find out that Gil sometimes goes miles out of his way, and drives past Marci's apartment, just hoping to get a glimpse of her.

Lillie McFerrin


  1. What a delicious follow-up! I do hope that we find out more about Gil and his conflict. Very nice!

  2. Wow! Gil needs to take stock and decide what he really wants. Nicely staged.

  3. ooooh interesting!! want to know more :P good story enjoyed reading it

  4. Oh, well now. She needs to get a clue.

    I'm glad I'm not the only one who's been haunted by a 5SF character!

  5. This is surely a common occurrence in marriages that lack true passion. If we could figure out a way to preserve passion in long term marriages, we would not only witness a revolution of positive, creative, productive energy in out society, but also we would become very very wealthy. What is the damned secret?!

    Looking forward to more of your work!

  6. What she doesn't know won't hurt her, but it's not looking so good for the future. Nicely done.

  7. Oh gosh! Talk about secrets. I really enjoyed this... Hope Gil man's up because emotionally he's gone.

  8. Seems like Gil has broken the cardinal rule - never fall in love with the "sideline"... because it seems like that's what's happened.
    Great take on the prompt.

  9. Thanks for all these terrific comments.

    I have to admit, I don't where Gil's head and heart are at the moment.

    I doubt he's fallen in love with the sideline, though. He's distracted and itchy, for sure, but that might just be a where-is-the-grass-greener problem.

    Whether this story line gets developed any further is up to Gil (that is if he'll let me rest) and the prompts, I guess.

    Then again, it might be up to Marci . . .


  10. I went back and read the "Devotion" piece. This is a great follow-up. It looks like Gil is heading into dangerous waters.

  11. I'm worried for them now...but I would love to hear more!


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